Mike’s Monday Message Takeover: Being Black and Authentic
I grew up in the Deep South during a time of great strife, so I don't know if my journey to authenticity is different. However, I think there are elements that all fundraisers of color, especially Black fundraisers, share.
AUTHENTIC
adjective
1. not false or copied; genuine; real:
Being genuine and real can be a challenge in a field based on persuading people to hand over the value they have earned or acquired to you for a cause you work for, especially when you do not look like them or may not have the same social background. No, those things should not matter, but they can.
It struck me a few weeks ago when I was at a fundraising affinity group virtual meeting for men of color. I was reminded how very different we were, yet many of us had some common characteristics. The one I identified with most was a sense of formality in our dress and manner. This properness was true of men across generations. We wear collared shirts and are clean-shaven or have neat facial hair. We wear ties—even bow ties. Other male fundraisers don't seem to feel the same need to be "proper." Where does this need come from? There are shelves of books that work to explain this phenomenon.
I wear a tie to work daily and sometimes for virtual meetings on my remote days. I also shave every day. No, I am perfectly aware that I have nothing to prove to anyone at my age and number of years in the field, yet my upbringing and cultural bearing require me to wear what I call my armor. I feel that attention will be paid at work when I am in a suit or wearing a tie.
Why should I feel that way? Why do so many other Black male fundraisers think similarly? Well, needless to say, it is cultural and driven by societal forces that go back hundreds of years, that this piece doesn't have time to explore. Books like Isabel Wilkerson's "Caste" do an excellent job explaining that part.
What do I mean by armor? The only way I can explain it is that it enables me to perform a very mentally challenging and emotionally charged job—asking for money. It’s almost as if Aldervan isn't the one putting himself emotionally on the line to handle the task. It’s H. Aldervan Daly, CFRE. But in reality, does that matter to my donor? Well, that depends—there is often a "sniffing-out period" between donors and fundraisers, especially regarding major gifts. Donors want to know their gift is in "good" hands. What those hands look like depends on many factors. So, how can you be authentic and be the person a donor wants to engage with?
Well, I encourage you to pursue authenticity and be mission-driven. You will find success if you work for the right organization that supports you and whose mission you feel passionate about. Engaging a donor might take longer, or a donor might choose not to help your organization—note that I did not say they wouldn’t support you.
In this shortest month of the year, I am reminded that we always need to push a little harder. Throughout my 35 years in fundraising, I have witnessed change—slow at times, but change nonetheless. Some days, I even feel like dressing down, and sometimes I do. We must each truly be ourselves. It helps to remember that it’s just a job, and there will be many in this field. Seek out one where you can bring your authentic self—however you define it. Then, you will find satisfaction at work and do your best for your organization, supporting a mission you believe in and that believes in you.
